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Timeless Wisdom

This week on “Life Shifting with Dr J” I had the opportunity to meet that rare, special kind of leader, one who truly “walks the talk.” In a world where scandal, duplicity, and political maneuvering seem to define the leadership landscape, it is encouraging–and inspiring–to know that there are leaders out there who have integrity, humanity, humility, and most importantly, wisdom. Dr David Surrenda, CEO of the Kripalu Institute for Yoga and Healing, is one of those leaders. He is a clinical psychologist and a thirty year veteran of the corporate, academic and organizational consulting worlds, and author of multiple books on leadership and self-development, most recently: “Retooling on the Run: Real Change for Leaders with no Time.”

I was honored to have him join me on my show. Click here to listen or download to Itunes/Mp3. Wowed by his clear, concise and simple message about leadership, I am in complete sync with his core principle: it is all about self-mastery. As I write in my book, “Shift: Let Go of Fear and Get Your Life in Gear,” it is impossible for us to be role models as leaders until we gain a measure of self-awareness — and humbly take up the gauntlet to LEAD OURSELVES.

As David pointed out in our conversation, self-mastery is not about becoming a “super hero,” but rather about becoming adept at stalking ourselves, becoming aware of our faults, our habits, and our fears–not with an ear for self-criticism, but with an eye for seeing how we can put in place practices to become more fully realized as humans.

Key to this journey of self-realization is shortening the “recovery time” from when go off track–get triggered, practice a bad habit, break a commitment, fall victim to fear, etc.

Mastery=Quick Recovery not Perfection

We will never be perfect, nor are we ever “finished” manifesting our full potential. BUT, with a commitment to continuously growing, learning and tracking ourselves, we can surely become more of WHO WE ARE MEANT TO BE.

I dearly hope you will take time to download the interview and hear from David directly. You will love his quick and concise six-step methodology for self-mastery. Here’s a preview synopsis:

KEY STEPS TOWARDS SELF-MASTERY

1. Gain Perspective– take the long view
2. Be a Student–of your self
3. Clarify Your Intent–know where you are headed
4. Map Your Patterns-look for gaps in consistency
5. Course Correct–don’t criticize, simply correct and re-balance
6. Evaluate Progress–shorten the “recovery time”

In a time when the world is crying out for wise leaders, I am heartened to know that people like David Surrenda are out there doing their thing, leading organizations that shape our world. Kripalu is one of the largest holistic health centers in the entire world…and I’m happy to be able to say, it is in good hands.

Thanks David…and to all, Namaste,

Dr J

Are you a “Conscious Marketer?”

Ever been to a networking event and have someone hand you a business card, tell you their name, and ask if they can “give you call”? Well, I have. Too many times. Sometimes I feel like people

Is this your networking dance?

attend these events with a stack of cards in hand, their only goal for the evening is to see how many cards they can give out…and snatch up from others.

What about having a REAL conversation? Maybe you only get to talk to one or two or three people during an entire evening, but you take the time to ask questions, learn about the person…to spend more time listening than talking? Have we lost the art of CONNECTION?

If you are in the “networking” or “sales” or “brand-building” mode…out there schmoozing and trying to find a job, sell your services or build a business…then you must, simply MUST, listen in to my recent radio show with guest Lynn Serafinn, conscious marketing expert and author of, “The Garden of the Soul: Lessons of Four Flowers that Unearth the Self.” Lynn is a book promoter, classical musician, and author of the up-coming book: “The Seven Graces of Marketing: How to Heal Humanity and the Planet by Changing the Way We Sell”.”

Lynn and I had a deep, rich and provocative conversation about a topic near and dear to my heart: how to SHIFT from a “transaction-oriented” approach to marketing to a “relationship-oriented” approach. Click here to listen or download to Itunes/Mp3.

And so you ask, what is the difference?

Well, to my mind…and Lynn seemed to echo my sentiments, the key difference between today’s tendency towards quantity and transaction-based connections (e.g. how many friends you have on Facebook fddoes NOT by itself, imply lots of sales of ANYTHING!) is whether you enter the connection point from FEAR…or LOVE. What? No, really.

Here’s the thing: we all feel anxious and nervous about meeting new people, or reaching out BEYOND OUR COMPUTER to connect with others. But when we enter that sacred moment of connection, reaching out our hand and saying “hello”…far too often that anxiety (e.g. fear or the unknown “other”) takes over, our breath gets shallow, we feel a knot in our stomach…and we slip into “robot” mode: “Hi, how are you? What do you do? Here’s my card…etc.”

The goal of the fearful ego is to GET THE HELL OUT OF THERE…and as soon as possible get back safely ensconced behind the cheese plate or better yet, the computer screen. This is the sort of anxiety/fear-based dynamic that tends to pervade the typical cocktail party or networking event. Everyone is smiling… NO ONE is really having a good time. BUT, it doesn’t have to be that way…

Crossing the bridge of connection

Love-based connections, or what I prefer to call “conscious connection,” starts from a different place. We take a few deep breaths; we feel our anxiety and accept it as natural (our silly ego attempting to protect us), and then we step into the moment of connection with ANTICIPATION, the energy of curiosity…deeply interested to KNOW this other being that I am blessed to meet at this moment in time.

We might say, as always, “hello, I am so and so…but then…WHO are you? What brought you to this event? What are you hoping to learn? What is the challenge you are struggling with in YOUR business? How might I help? How might we help each other? Etc…” Many minutes will go by…you might only get to hand out a few business cards. Yet, something else will very likely occur: you will relax. You will soften in your body and feel empathy instead of anxiety. After all, we are all in this swirl of life TOGETHER. We are all, ultimately, looking for the same thing: to be heard, to connect, to feel loved…to belong.

By entering into a networking opportunity with a LOVING heartset instead of a fearful mindset, something wonderful, precious, sacred, and key to the success of every business might just occur: you make a friend, find a partner, a customer, or a referral to someone who can help you land a job or build your business. You might have find someone you can help out as well. And a real, powerful connection is born.

We are all connected

Lynn and I talked for an hour…and it felt like five minutes. She told me her wonderful story–the amazing journey of how she parlayed a music career into a spiritual journey to the far-flung wilds of India and on to a marketing career–but most importantly, she shared with me why she is so passionate about helping people SHIFT the way they promote their books, their brands, and their businesses.

She is calling for a wholesale REINVENTION of the way we do business, away from the old paradigm of fear-based, scarcity-based, competition, towards a space of gratitude, abundance, and deep connection. It is all about remembering a deep truth, one which we all know in our hearts but so quickly forget when the pressure to sell, pay the bills, get known, be “out there”…takes over: we are all connected. We are all longing to belong. I was moved by her passion, her spirit…and her dream…as I hold the same one, for my clients…and for the world.

SO…if you are out there on the entrepreneurial, job-hunting, or life-reinventing circuit, doing the networking, Facebook-ing, tweeting thing…listen in to Lynn and try to be more CONSCIOUS and thoughtful when approaching that “unknown other”. Don’t get caught falling down the rabbit hole fantasy that “its all about the numbers”. It ain’t true. The sales pitch (I know, I know you’re supposed to have the 30 second elevator pitch…oy!) might bring you a bit of business

How many "clicks" will pay the rent?

— but surely, in the long run, it won’t feel satisfying and it won’t be sustainable. What does last…is becoming part of a community of REAL people…forging and nourishing those LOVING spaces where people come together…to live, learn and support each others dreams.

I hope you’ll listen in and let me know what you think. I’m all ears!

Dr j

Life Shifting with Dr J: A Voice of Hope

All I can say is…Wow!

Despite a few technical glitches — we worked out the kinks and I had an amazing conversation this week on Life Shifting with Dr J–with my special guest, Dr Michael Picucci! If you missed our talk, here’s the link to play online or download:http://transformationtalkradio.com/meet_shows.php?id=3961

I was so excited to reconnect with my longtime friend and mentor, Dr Michael Picucci, at a recent showing of a great new documentary, “2010: A Time For change.” If you haven’t seen this film yet, make haste to a screening. It is a beautiful testament to WHAT’S POSSIBLE as humans finally wake up from the “trance” of industrial capitalism and a new awareness emerges–an awareness of the interconnection between humans and ALL life on the planet we call home.

In our interview, Michael shared with me his new-found optimism about humanity at this time of great change. He reflected on his thirty year healing journey and pointed to the emergence of a new “age of wisdom” arising as the free-love, mind expansion experiment of the sixties generation comes full circle. Continue reading